Navy Captain wrongly asks for ‘decisive action’ instead of waiting to see if virus can kill that many sailors

Bonnet Bots Satire News Service

Recently, the Captain of an aircraft carrier was fired for a letter written to many people at the top, outside the ‘correct’ chain of command, asking for ‘decisive action’ to save sailors on his Covid-19 infected ship. “Frankly, I don’t understand what this ‘decisive action’ thing is all about, maybe it is some term made up by fake media”, stated one ‘top’ official on conditions of anonymity. His superiors could not be reached, as somehow, he seemed to not have any. At all. “We don’t believe in it, but the captain asked for ‘decisive action’, and we gave it to him. Firing IS decisive action”, he stated to the Bonnet Bot.

“The Navy captain not only failed to downplay the Covid-19 pandemic but also asked for ‘decisive action’ when the only logical thing to do was to wait and watch if the virus could actually kill that many sailors”


A 2007 picture of Anthony Fauci, the director of the NIAID (National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases). Image credits below.

When asked about the correctness of the action, he stated, “If the situation is mishandled, the leader should be punished. The ship went overboard with a virus problem. Just because we had asked them to give us advanced notice before taking any action for protecting troops, and to go ahead after checking with us so that the white house was informed, they shouldn’t have actually informed the top guys OPENLY. We thus fired the ship’s leader.

Similarly, if someone cannot handle an infectious disease in spite of being the head of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (NIAID), he too may deserve to go. I know that most people think he is experienced, clear and right about his approach, but I know better than most people. I am a very smart man”, he stated, again on conditions of strict anonymity.

At the time of going to press, several politicians had still not completed reading the letter from the Navy Captain, as it was ‘just too long’–over 5 pages long–as if it was a ‘class on literature’. This was one more point of proof of the letter being ‘inappropriate’

Image credit: NIAID – Anthony S. Fauci, M.D., NIAID Director image From Creative Commons https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0 ; Aircraft carrier image: Michael Afonso from Unsplash.com

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