Bonnet Bots Satire News Service
In a bold and unprecedented move, the City Urban Public-transport Independent Decision authority (CUPID) has announced that only two people should be allowed to dangle from the doors of public transport vehicles, such as trains, and even buses, during the ongoing Covid-19 pandemic. Statistically, there are at least seven and a half persons dangling from the door of any given Mumbai local train during peak hours, while for Delhi buses, the number is 4.73. In Bangalore buses, the number is zero on a regular day but increases to 17.5 just after it rains. Surprisingly, the CUPID authority has realized that there might be a threat to the lives of these people, at least during the Covid-19 pandemic.
“Is this in order to maintain adequate social distancing?” questioned the Yellow Bonnet Bot to the head of the decision association. “No” he answered, “it is because hospitalization, if at all they find a bed, is risky due to the pandemic. What if they get infected in the hospital after they fall off? We can’t take a risk”
Just before going to Press, the Blue Bonnet Bot had asked the CUPID official, “Are there any other known threats due to such dangling?” “No” said the CUPID official.
“What about the threat of accidents arising from people falling off the trains or buses?” retorted the Bot. “Well, you only asked about known threats, and gauging from the behavior of these people, this other threat doesn’t fit the ‘known threats’ category”.
Image credit: Illustration by Vishakha Nale Raut from Bonnet Bots Media LLP